"far from what I once was, but not yet what i'm going to be"

This quote is a subject that keeps coming up in conversations lately and it pretty much sums up what i have been feeling lately. My experience out here has been, well, lets just say it's had it's ups and downs. Until my move a couple months ago into Manhattan, I could not wait unitl the moment Heavenly Father said "Okay Madi, you've learned what you needed, now come back to Utah." I basically gave the big man upstairs an ultimatum (thats awful I know) and said if things don't get better, I don't care what you think I am packing my bags and going home.

In Logan I felt like life could not get better and i've come to realize how unique my experience was there. And dispite me saying "New York?? But life is already perfect why do I need to move half way across the country? Can't I just learn what you would teach me out there, here?" He got me out of my comfort- blanket-utah and knew that this is exactly what i needed. Sending me out here only knowing one person was the only way I could have grown a love, friendship, and appreciation for Him. This is my alone time with Heavenly Father, to get to know Him and myself a little better.

So here we go, i think it's time and i'm just gonna say it.

 I am HAPPY here.


Thats kind of a big deal if you didn't know.

I put my move back to Utah date for January and was counting down the days until it came, but I don't know anymore. The closer it gets the more I love it here and I can't see myself moving away so soon. I HAVE SO MUCH MORE I NEED TO LEARN!!! January will mark a year of me living here and thats just not enough time. At least not enough time for me.
 I would say i'm about 60/40.


What do you think?


  1. YOUR FACE IS 60/40!!

    and i think you better go back in and switch those numbers to NY-0 UT-100. like now. or i will throw a cloth diaper on you.

  2. I feel pleased. I would feel more pleased if you were 10/ new york 10/utah and 80/ small town colorado.
    your number one madI!

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  4. I'm covering my ears. I can't hear you.

  5. The only conditions I'll put on this is that the numbers add up to 100.

  6. stay in NY if that's where it feels right! i cant wait to see the fall pics!